I'm not a piece of meat!

I am about 4 months old and weigh 8.5 pounds. I am 11 inches tall and 14 inches long.

I know this because I am Not Amused by the measuring tape that dad and my girl used earlier today. Taking down my measurements. How RUDE! There is more to me than just NUMBERS and a PRETTY FACE!

Not such a wimp!

It's just my girl and me for a little while because mom and dad are on a trip. Tonight I was laying at my girl's feet when I suddenly ran to the front door barking and screaming my head off. I saw something!! I was so freaked out that I growled at her to prevent her from going near the door... then I went to the windows and checked everything out myself. I stood there, lips peeled back, crouched down, growling really low to ward off any danger. I normally act like a wimp, but this was serious!

I finally let my girl come near the door when I thought it was safe. We investigated a bit. I just couldn't tell my girl what I saw out there! Speaking different languages is such a communication barrier for us sometimes!

Luckily my girl put the alarm system on then and turned on a bunch of lights and made sure everything was all closed up and locked. Pretty scary, huh?

Yummy!

We had a visitor, so of course when the doorbell rang, I woofed and woofed and my woofs turned into howls. My humans seem to be proud of me when I do this. A man (I guess a friend) came over and although he wasn't too kean on petting me, he seemed to like me ok. They all sat in the living room on the sofa, so of course I let him know that it's MY sofa by jumping on next to him and sniffing his stuff. They talked for a while... and of course ate stuff that I didn't get any of (sigh) and then he left after about two hours.

I just got to taste something called a carrot. Was pretty yummy, except that the pieces were sort of big, so it took me some time to break them down. Then my girl got all freaked out and took them away because I sort of coughed one little piece up. DRAT!! I saw mom stash the little pieces in the fridge, so maybe tonight. I can tell that my girl is trying to pester dad into going with us for a walk soon. What's not so cool is that mom wants them all to go see a movie tonight... I don't see why dogs can't come. I'm really well-behaved. Well, outside of my house.

Eskie Alarm

Today the doorbell rang and I ran to the door barking and howling and growling at full speed. Now that I understand that strange people come and go from there, I'm not scared to protect my home and my family. Take that, strangers!

And today I shocked my family by jumping off of the bed. TWICE!

Toothless Wonder

I have lost FOUR TEETH. It is getting kind of hard for me to eat my food, so my girl has been wetting it for me. It tastes yummmmy like that and I can eat it faster!

So I guess being known around here as the Toothless Wonder isn't so bad after all.

Except for when my girl says I look senile. Grrrr. Maybe I should BITE her. She is just cruisin' for a bruisin'!

Getting even

Honestly, I can't even believe the nerve of my girl sometimes!! First she ignored me all day long, making me nap when I wanted to play! She knows that I am partially toothless and TEETHING! I brought her a different toy several times and did she toss them? Play tug? No. NOTHING. So, fine, girl. I can take a hint!

Then a few hours later she packs me up in this... this vile little black bag. Granted there were holes everywhere (she says for ventilation, but I think so she can spy on me), but it was ANNOYING. I just stared at her evilly for a while. I'm really good at it. But eventually I got tired of that, so I went to sleep. We were in the car for about an hour, so I got a nice nap.

We arrived at an outdoor mall where dogs are allowed. We met brother and sister-in-law there, and I also met a chihuahaha (I was bigger!), a maltese (she was cute!), and a dalmation (he was mean!). I was able to run around then, but there were sooo many people and they all wanted to touch me! People in the stores thought I was really cute and my girl could barely even get five steps before being stopped. Someone at a store called Coach thought my girl should get a big pink bag to carry me around in. I suggested with use of my few teeth that she kindly inform them I'm a BOY. She got the message and let them know. Humans.

ANYWAY. We got home. I needed a plan of retaliation, and I needed one fast!! So when my girl was unsuspectingly munching on some mango in bed tonight... I made like 007 and stealthily stole a piece!!

Contemplating my strategy - turn, steal, run, eat -and my triumphant victory as I escape with the mango!

Ah, the aftermath. I enoyed my mango, but I wonder... was it really worth it? My girl says that the doggie police come for little dogs who steal mango pieces. I fear I will the life of a fugitive - constantly looking over his shoulder.

GULP.

Another One Bites the Dust

Today my girl and I went for a long walk in the morning and then she left me to go grocery shopping. When she got back, we were hanging out in the kitchen and I suddenly let out a blood curdling scream. I had this loose tooth that had been bugging me ALLLLL night and all morning.

It finally came out (and hurt)... so I gave it to my girl as a present.

Ouchieees

A bunch of my teeth are loose. :( They hurt and I'm really grumpy. I don't want to play. I just want to cuddle with my girl.

She says that my teeth look like little dangling fangs. Sigh. Show a little compassion, girl.

Umm... ?

My girl just turned to me with a crazed gleam in her eye and said something about investigating halloween costume options.

Should I be worried?????

PetSmart Adventures!

Wowsa, funnnnn day! I drove the car to PetSmart!

Well ok, I tried to drive but the humans wouldn't let me and technically I couldnt really reach the steering wheel. And I had to sit by myself with the seat belt on. But if anyone asks, I drove, ok?


PetSmart was a lot of fun too. At first I got to walk around, but lots of big doggies tried to eat me, so my girl held me... but then a big doggie tried to eat HER trying to get to me! So then I got to cruise around in the shopping cart. I could smell stuff wayyyy up high and best of all, my humans could relax.

Where on earth did I put my PetSmart card?? Oh, how embarrassing!!

Drama King

I've been found out. I like the theatre. I like to act. I am a... thespian.

But I didn't want my humans to know about it!!

My girl was running around with me and one of my paws got pulled a little. I made a big deal and started whimpering and limping around. I even went to mom for good measure with my best "Mom! Your daughter just muuuurdered me!" wail.

I guess I took it a bit far because my girl and my mom were soooo scared and were getting ready to rush me to the vet because I kept on limping. While they were upstairs getting their things, I started doing some zoomies with my toys downstairs.

Then mom found me, so once I saw her... I started limping again - obviously. She called my girl, and told me I'm a drama king!!!!!!! NO FAIR!

Now mom and dad say that I am conniving! What?! Maybe they mean I'm convincing? Great, so give me treats!

Daytrip!

I had my first daytrip today to Connecticut. Mom, dad, and my girl had some business to take care of there, so we all hopped in the car and went. It was about three hours each way. Luckily I got to sleep most of it, but sometmes I looked out the window and grinned at the passing people on the highway. People always smile back at me. Maybe I should be a Goodwill AmbassaDog.

I saw the Mystic and New London waterfronts and the ocean (whoa!) and smelled a lot of new things. My girl tried to get me to do my business in a really wooded area, but pppsshhh, what was she thinking? I only use the grassy area facilities. I'm a classy guy, you know!

I got so much attention - everyone there LOVED me! One man stopped to tell my girl that I am incredibly well-behaved. When he found out that I'm only 4 months old, he asked my girl if she would train his dog! That was funny, but only because I knew my girl was thinking Yeah, right. He was all... "Has he been to obedience class yet?" and she said "No" and he was like... "WOW!!!!!!!!!" Lots of exclamations!

Then a lady driving by while we were taking a break stopped her car and said that she has a bigger version at home and that we act the same way. She asked if I'm a small Samoyed because I'm so calm. Hah! Little does she know that I am anything but calm!

Then a really funny guy walked by and said to me, "Dog, you are way too clean!" I shot my girl a look that said it all! Ironic because I haven't been bathed in over a month and mom keeps telling my girl I need one. But I am a self-cleaning dog (much like a kitty) and have no doggie odor... even if I get wet or roll around in mud. I always clean myself off.

Then when we found some appropriate green facilities for me to use, a lady eating at an outdoor restaurant called to us "Is that an American Eskimo?" She just thought I was the cutest thing. I was a bit of an attention ham and went with my tail wagging to get lots of pats! There was an outdoor band playing and the lead singer winked at me too!

A lot of people on the street asked my girl if I'm a Pomeranian. If they'd have asked me, I would've given them a cool stare and then said "You're fired." I'm just dying to impersonate Trump.

Now for the best part of the trip. When dinner time came, my girl suggested we all eat in the car, but dad was optimistic that we could find a place that would accept me. Mom and my girl didn't think so, but Dad spotted a nice looking pizza place and went in to speak with the owner while my girl and I waited outside. I sat and gave the owner my best "pleeeease" look through the glass. Dad was just about to whip out his sunglasses and joke that I'm his seeing eye dog! Uh, I wouldn't know exactly how to pull it off, but luckily the owner caved because I'm so cute and my family promised that I'm very well behaved.

I got to sit in the pizza booth on the bench with them. I ate my kibble from my food bowl and drank water from a plastic cup (like the humans!). I didn't utter one peep, but whenever anyone new came in, I hopped on my girl's lap to check them out. The restaurant staff said I'm great for business because everyone wanted to see me! The restaurant owner said that I am welcome back anytime. What incredibly nice humans!

Then I slept curled in a ball next to my girl the whole drive home. Great daytrip to Connecticut, but I was sure glad to see my house again when we got back home!

The Evil Balloon

Dad's birthday was on the 9th, but he and mom were out of town, so we celebrated today. My gift to him was a helium balloon with a doggie on it. At first I was curious about the balloon and sniffed it and really liked it. My girl wanted me to surprise Dad with it so she gave me the string and told me to go to Dad. But while I was running to Dad... I felt like the balloon was chasing me and got really scared! My girl got it off me.

Now I bark at it because I don't like it. And I try to warn my humans when I see it because I don't want it to get them.

My friend Casper had a similar experience.

The Puppy Formerly Known as Mister Gandhi

Lately my family has been calling me Mister Gandhi. They ask my girl, "So, what did Mister Gandhi do today?" and she replies, "Well, he didn't chase any squirrels, he wouldn't bark at any birds, he sniffed a bunny and hopped around with it, he helped the chipmunk find a good spot to dig, he ran away from the neighborhood cat..."

They all think they're soo funny. I just am a pacifist. What's so wrong about that?

As it turns out... nothing. My girl is really happy about my atypical puppy behavior because she, too, loves all furry woodland creatures. And she understands that I'm only 7 pounds and that most cats could probably kick my tush!

But this morning when my girl and I were outside, I surprised her. Apparently it was just a bunch of birds, but they were chirping so loud and they sounded exactly like my squeaky toys, and I... I barked! And then I growled! Just a baby growl. I didn't want them to call my bluff or anything! Just enough not to be called a wimp anymore!!

Zoomies & The Bunny Hop

I am notorious for two very cute things - zoomies and the bunny hop!

I get zoomies when I'm really hyper, when my humans are playing with me, and when I'm reeeeealllly happy. I race all over the room, on the couch, all around my humans, and then STOP! suddenly. My ears go back and I look like a race horse!

I also do the bunny hop when I go up the stairs. I'm so little and fluffy and I have to go up FAST so I don't get stuck. I look like a rabbit!

I also get zoomies when big brother comes over. I never want him to leave so I bark bark bark and bring him toys to distract him and my last resort is zoomies. He usually does them with me!

Getting Better

I've been on Panacur for under 48 hours now and I'm starting to feel a tiny bit better. It tastes gross, but I'm good so I open my mouth when my girl gives it to me. I just give her a really bad look.

I'm having ice chips and little squirts of water too, since I was a little dehydrated. My girl says that my gums have good color and pressure return again and that I am a lean, mean, peeing machine. I don't know if that's a compliment or... what.

I am playing again and loving life!

Woe is Me

I haven't been able to sleep at all. I have to go outside really often. At night my girl stayed up with me. I gave her sad eyes and there were lots of mean sounds coming from my tummy.

She called the vet first thing this morning and I didn't even get mad at her.

It turns out that I have round worms. I didn't like the doctor who saw me and my girl says we're not going back there. The doctor told my girl that I'm dehydrated and then started to whisk me out of the room, saying she'd be right back. Dad and my girl were pretty ticked off and told her to cool it, put me down, and talk to them. She said she was going to inject fluid under my skin and that I'd look a bit like a camel for a few hours. YIKES! My girl asked her just how dehydrated she thinks I am and the doctor replied... about 3%. So my girl told her that she would stay home with me and force me to drink and give me ice chips rather than put me through unnecessary discomfort.

Dad says the vet tried to "pull a fast one" and my girl was pretty annoyed. I am glad that they stuck up for me, because I couldn't do it myself. It helps to have good humans on your side.